“Ten” my friends screamed out loud with such enjoyment and adulation for the incoming year.
I found it difficult to muster up any energy to join in on the celebration, the new year wasn’t going to bring anything new for me; rather my world was going to be spun into a world of chaos.
“9” the crowd screamed out once again; this time even louder.
You see I will be going to prison in less than a week, I’m out on bail and I’ve already been convicted; guilty. My family did everything they could to keep me out but now my time has run out and the freedom that I’ve taken for granted all these years will now be absent.
My girlfriend tenderly caressed my hand in hers and as I turned to look down at her I saw a tear cascade down her beautiful face, causing my heart to stutter. I knew she was going to miss me, and I her; but fate is not kind to people like me.
“7, 6, 5, 4…” the chant continued as I aimlessly stared straight ahead into the void of emptiness lost in my own thoughts of oblivion.
“Look at me” Amy told me grabbing at my face pulling it down towards hers. Her eyes were glazed over in emotion and as her gaze sharply pierced through my heart I felt the darkness that had engulfed me as of lately take control and I pushed her away.
“3” the shouting intensified.
“2” My blood pressure began to spike, I needed fresh air; the overcrowded room was suffocating.
I stormed towards the door trying to flee from this dreadful moment, I could gradually hear my girlfriend whimper as she shouted out at me; pleading me to stay with her, but I couldn’t. I needed solace, I needed escape, I needed; something and I all I could do is shout back,
With that I walked out into the hallway shutting the door behind me, and before I heard the enthusiastic crowd yell out “1” in celebration I screamed up to the heavens as if God himself could some how hear me.
“This is not fair, I just want to go back, why can’t I go back”.
Tears began streaming down my face entrancing me in a moment of uncertainty as I dropped to my knees in utter defeat, understanding I was…